Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Hidden Sins


12 Who can discern his errors?
Forgive my hidden faults.

13 Keep your servant also from willful sins;
may they not rule over me.
Then will I be blameless,
innocent of great transgression.

14 May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight,
O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:12-14
I know I've said things I shouldn't have at times, but I can also bite my tongue and not say what I'm really thinking. Problem is my heart is still thinking it. That's the first way this passage convicted me. From verse 14, I need the words of my mouth AND the meditation of my heart to be pleasing to God. Some things I know as soon as I say it or think it that it is sinful, that's what verse 13 is talking about: willful sins or deliberate sins. But other thoughts or responses or actions have become so habitual to me that I don't see them as sin, they are hidden. That's what verse 12 is talking about, "who can discern his errors? Forgive my hidden faults." That's the second way this passage convicted me. What are my hidden sins? What can others see wrongful in me that I can't? Who will sharpen me and call me out on my sins lovingly?

Even if no one will, my prayer is that God will reveal them to me like King David asks in Psalm 139:23-24-

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Or in Psalm 51:10-

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.

Lord, this truly is my prayer. Would You reveal to me either through relationships, or circumstances, or conviction, or reading Your Word, or all the above what my heart is holding on to and disguising as something other than sin. Remove my pride and selfish thoughts that are acting as protective walls around something that is not worth protecting. May they not rule over me. Create in me clean heart so that my words and my thoughts will be pleasing in Your sight.

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